Thursday, 18 January 2018

TWENTY-EIGHTEEN INTENTIONS


the idea of new year's 'resolutions' has grown to sit not quite right with me the past few weeks. to me, traditional new year's resolutions appear as though they are based off the idea that you're doing something wrong, or that there's a problem that needs to be fixed. to resolve is to "settle or find a solution to a problem". obviously i think its great to have goals, but we are not problems that need a strict solution put in place. to me the whole vibe behind resolutions usually comes across as rather negative and from a place of lacking or percieved failure within ourselves. resolutions are more often than not based on thinking that we aren't good enough the way we are, and that we will be happier if we change who we are or get something else. and after all, if we're honest with ourselves, the vast majority of people don't stick to these strict, specific resolutions put in place on january 1st, further leading to these feelings of hopelessness and defeat.

while i don't think you need a new year to set about making positive changes to your life either, i do love the proverbial blank slate and fresh start that a new year brings as much as the next person. so, this year i have decided to set intentions for the year ahead. put simply, an intention is "a thing intended; an aim or a plan". instead of coming from a place of lacking within ourselves and setting rigid resolutions, to me intentions come from a simple place of wanting to feel and do better. rather than setting a guilt-trap likely to be triggered by broken resolutions, setting intentions create gentle goals of how we want to live our lives in a way that promotes continual self growth.

in my opinion, above all else, setting intentions can help us to manifest the life we want to live. our intentions set manifestation into motion using the law of attraction. each thought we have creates an energy flow within and around our physical being. this energy then attracts the same kind of energy right back. so, if your thought patterns are negative, your energy will be negative, and thus, you will attract negative experiences. the opposite is in turn just the same! thus, by setting positive intentions in place, you can begin to manifest positive change and growth in your life. 

with all of that being said, below is my list of fifteen intentions i have for the year of twenty-eighteen.


what are your intentions for 2018? comment them below, i'd love to hear.


as always, thank you for reading and leaving lovely comments below my posts! i love hearing your feedback and own personal stories and opinions. i head to hawaii in less than a week, so guaranteed my next post will be a gushing tribute to my time spent there!

lots of love,


Sunday, 17 December 2017

WARM WINDS



i felt like i couldn't breathe the other day so i jumped in my car and drove until i got to the ocean. being at the ocean on windy moody days is my favourite, especially when my mind feels just as stormy.

it feels surreal to say this, but i booked flights to hawaii yesterday. i can't explain it but my entire being has been called to hawaii for the longest time. i've been feeling pretty down about everything in my life for a while, i think mainly because this year has been such a damn rollercoaster. all the endless heartbreak back and forth for months and months, doing a course i've hated, friendship dramas, etc etc, has left me feeling super drained and lost. honestly i've just really wanted to be anywhere but here for a long time. after i booked the flights i also realised that it'd been a while since i'd really done anything that challenged or scared me in a good way. i'd become bored and uninspired. stagnant. a guest lecturer at uni the other day said that "if you're just at home watching netflix, you're going to be a boring person". while that may sound simple and maybe a little silly, it really struck a cord in me. as cliche as it is, i honestly do feel as though solo travel is the one thing i need to do to gain back a sense of myself. i really did lose myself this year. i'm so proud of myself for surrendering and listening to my heart and soul, even though i'm slightly terrified. t minus 38 days til hawaii baby!



Saturday, 2 December 2017

WHAT CAN I SAY, I'M A GEMINI



i've been staring at a blank notebook all day trying to come up with ideas for blog posts. actually, i've been staring at that blank page for months now. writing and creating posts on here has always brought me the most joy and satisfaction, but lately when i've sat down to try and write there's just been a mental brick wall. while staring at that blank page today i realised that the truth of the situation is that i just haven't really known what i want to say on this platform anymore.

while i've always loved writing and photography, this blog started as solely a fashion blog. i would beg my mum to take photos of me in whatever new outfit i'd bought. i'd always had a love for clothes, but turns out most of the time i actually hated being in front of a camera. i struggled with the way i looked and always wanted the creative control behind taking the images, rather than just posing in front. i also soon became insecure about posting these photos. i think partially due to fear of judgement from my peers at the time, but also those posts brought forth somewhat a sense of identity confusion. i saw loving clothes and posting all these photos of myself as vain and shallow and somewhat contradictory to the 'deep' and intellectual side i also have always had. i do now see my love for clothes as just another form of creative expression, with the colours and textures and shapes of clothing telling a story just like a piece of artwork. so while to this day there is that part of me that still really loves fashion, doing outfit posts of myself limits me creatively almost completely. which i guess is then where all this 'other stuff' started popping up.

if you've followed me for a while you'd know that i've posted travel photography and recipes and hippie bullshit and poetry and rants on a real range of different topics. since the solely fashion related post days, my blog has become a mismatch and jumble of different themes. i've never seen a problem with this or gave it a second thought really, up until recently. throughout the design course i've been doing this year the fact that i have a blog has slipped a few times, and understandably each time i'm met with a "what type of blog do you have?". and in response each time i stumble out a "uh its a mix of everything i guess", which is then met with a "you know if you focused on one thing you'd be more successful". i guess the fact that this exact conversation has happened a number of times started getting to me. i have all these elements to my personality and different things i like and i've been unsure of how to present those here, or which ones i want to focus on. i love clothes and spirituality and veganism and the idea of saving the world and poetry and photography and i guess i've just realised that i can post about all those things. screw people telling me i need to focus on one thing for my blog to be successful. i never started this blog to "be successful". i'm not going to limit myself or my blog to a label - this isn't a 'fashion blog' or a 'health blog' or a 'lifestyle blog', this has always and will only ever be an 'araina blog'. i'm not going to squeeze this creative platform into any kind of box. 

i guess this struggle to define and categorise my blog has been mirroring my inner thoughts of myself and my personality lately too. i've always had that real mix of loving 'material' things as well as exploring 'deeper' spiritual elements. recently i've been struggling with the balance between the two and trying to work out where exactly i want to sit on the scale of those things. i think my answer to that question will always fluctuate, and that's totally fine. right now i'm okay with spending one friday night reading tarot cards and journalling for hours and the next drinking and partying all night, or, getting eyelash extensions and going to a sound healing bath the same day. i don't need to fit myself into a perfect mold of a "spiritual person" or whatever to still enjoy elements of that nature. just like my blog, i'm realising that i don't need to be easily definable or digestible. 

my personality and the things i post on this blog will continue to be a jumble i'm forever working out. i think i will always be a walking set of contradictions. what can i say, i'm a freaking double gemini after all.


Monday, 6 November 2017

SEPTEMBER - OCTOBER DIARY


well hello - i’m back with a new blog design and hopefully a new sense of inspiration and post regularity! as it’s been a minute or two i thought i’d do just a little update post recapping the last couple of months in my world.

september and october were both very tough and very beautiful.

i spent these two months hugging trees, falling in love with the smell of jasmine, buying a new car, snowboarding, drinking coffee again, kissing and crying. my days were filled with spring blooms, live music, meals cooked with love, heartbreak, old friends and new connections, sunshine on bare skin, solo dance parties, social media breaks, spontaneous hair dyeing, picnics of mangoes and watermelon, poetry books, gratitude journals, a million cups of chamomile tea, and so much laughter.

loverboy and i ended things for good which simultaneously hurt a whole lot and also felt really good. since first breaking up we’d dragged things on for eight months of back and forth which was partially torture, but he was my best friend and first love and it took a lot to walk away from that. when you’ve been head over heels for someone for two years it’s hard to let go of that part of your life. however, after the initial aching, it brought a real sense of freedom and relief that my energy no longer had to be spent on that situation. i’m so proud of myself for walking away from a situation that no longer serves me. it’s okay to outgrow what no longer works. it’s also okay to have growing pains from that.

in search of some temporary peace, i fell in love with taking long walks. having my sun, moon and rising signs all air signs makes me feel pretty airheaded and ungrounded a lot of the time, and getting back into my body can really help with that. getting out into nature and breathing in fresh air and that good ass prana does wonders to most situations. i also really tried to incorporate movement into my day. whether it be going for a long walk or doing yoga, i’ve recently found the power of exercise for moving stuck energy around the body so it flows freely. doing yoga flows to music became my new obsession this month. so dang good for the body and soul. leading on from that also sprung my newfound tendency to break out in solo dance parties.

september and october taught me the importance of connection. within those months i lost both my best friends from the past year or two. while these were both through my own doing and to better align the people closest to me with my highest self, initially it still left me feeling pretty lonely. don’t get me wrong, i completely love spending time alone and being the introvert i am it’s so essential to my wellbeing, but i do also of course crave that connection and love. i’m pretty sensitive to everything and do need a lot of my own introspective space, but i do think a lot of the time i perhaps place too much value on that and don’t fully realise or forget how much i do love spending time with the right people. connection is at the centre of life after all. i really reconnected with my old best friend, sinead (present in a lot of the above photos) which i couldn’t be happier about, and made a lot of sweet new friends this month.

i realised that sometimes self-love means yoga classes and face masks and crystals, and sometimes it means letting yourself cry in your car and going on long sweaty runs and telling people they’ve hurt you or admitting you’ve hurt them. self-care isn’t always fun and beautiful, sometimes it’s just difficult and painful. i drank alcohol a few times after i think not touching it for over six months. i guess i’d been so focused on healing and trying to look after myself and didn’t feel as though getting drunk aligned with that. i think focusing on healing and self-care by looking after yourself and journaling, etc etc, is obviously so incredibly important but i forget that sometimes just letting go of everything for a while and having a dance all night is just as important and beneficial for your soul.

similarly, i was taught lessons of balance in other ways too. especially that the dark/negative is just as, if not more important than the light/positive, because it’s in that darkness that we really grow. in the past few months i’ve felt a lot of shit coming up that i have to work on – the shadow work. it’s understandably difficult to want to sit with icky feelings but i’ve been trying to do just that, because there is no use attempting to ignore or supress them. you’ve just gotta feel through them, so they don’t become stuck in your mind and body. as always, writing through stuff has been my number one tool, but this past month i also tried talking through things with people more. touching back in with that deeper connection i guess.

i also worked on learning lessons of surrendering, patience and trusting my intuition. when i get stressed about things i’ve been trying to remember that i’m divinely taken care of and that the universe always has my back. just surrendering is so important because it’s when we try to force things or ignore our intuition that things start getting messy, as they aren’t aligned with that greater picture. because i’m literally the most indecisive person in the world (again, triple air signs), i struggle to distinguish between intuitive gut feelings. i think your sense/trust of that intuition develops the more you do tap in and actually learn to listen to it though.

as well as listening to my intuition, i’ve been trying to listen to my body in other ways too, especially with what i should be fuelling it with. i have been struggling a bit with filling it with quite a bit of (vegan) junk which leaves me feeling pretty gross. trying to pay attention to things that feel as though they're lowering my vibrational level. i do feel like i’ve been slightly battling this urge to be spontaneous and careless and maybe even verging on self-destructive. i guess when i’m feeling kind of off for some reason or another that tends to be one potential mindset i tap into. honouring that i am still a teenager so some of that is understandable, but trying not to sink into it too much because ultimately that isn’t aligned with how i want to be or live. i listened to a podcast the other day that gave the best wisdom: before making any decision, ask yourself if it’s what your highest self would want or do. if you were a perfect being of love. what would you take in and put out. what would you put in your body, what choices and actions would you take, etc. i love that. it’s such a simple yet profound way to live.


i was about to apologise for this rambling mess, but for one, you guys should be more than used to that by now and two, this is my own little corner of the internet and i don’t have to apologise for anything in this space. maybe november will bring less apologies and more thank yous. thank you for reading this. i really enjoyed putting together this post. i feel like aiming to do one of these monthly or every few months would help me pick up my camera more every day. i really do love documenting moments and having both photos and words to look back on. let me know if you guys enjoy posts like this at all in the comments below.




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